Back again

I cannot believe I’ll ever be here again.

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4 Responses to “Back again”

  1. Anonymous Says:

    I cannot believe you never finished the N32 ABI port ;(

  2. nobody Says:

    I cannot believe you never finished the N32 ABI port ;(

    • Anonymous Says:

      Sorry for letting you guys down. I’ve never forgotten this experience. It’s a wound to me that cannot heal. Probably that’s why I don’t want to come back here. Not only that I didn’t keep my promise but I kind of feel that I betrayed most of the people that put their trust and effort into at that time, especially the Debian and Loongson community.

      I was naive and overoptimistic about my ability back then. The project exposed many of my shortcomings even today I still have like tendency to underestimate difficulty, procrastination, not result oriented etc.

      I know I need to do something to make me feel better, to walk out of the shadow. I cannot simply avoid it. I need to face it. But I have to be honest to myself and everyone that I’m not at enthusiastic about this project as I were, although Debian and FOSS are still things I believe in. It’s just that there’re many things in my life that I need to pay attention to and my time and energy have to shared among all of them.

      If I could find something that I can do and also contributes to the community, I will do it. I hope the community will not judge me as a loser or even worse a cheater, who cannot do things right. Failure hurts to everyone including me.

  3. Andy Cater Says:

    It’s OK to get it wrong: it’s OK to have too much to do: it’s OK to fail to do something the way you wanted or promised.

    It’s all OK: next time you try, you will be better. If you need help, you can ask for it if you say “I need help to do …” – if you don’t ask, no one will ever know.

    Basically, it’s all OK – you can always start over again – and sometimes, admitting you have to start again brings respect.

    It’s OK.

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